All Things Cannot Be Fixed... Some Need Healing

 When something breaks, our first instinct is to fix it. A broken chair can be repaired. A broken appliance can be replaced. But life doesn't always work that way. Some things cannot be fixed. They need healing.

It took me many years to understand the difference. There were relationships that did not become what I hoped they would be. There were words spoken that could never be taken back. There were disappointments that quietly chipped away at my confidence. There were decisions—some mine, some made for me—that changed the direction of my life forever. For a long time, I kept trying to fix everything. I wanted people to change. I wanted circumstances to improve. I wanted life to become fair. I wanted the pain to disappear. But healing taught me that not everything is meant to be fixed. Sometimes the relationship doesn't return to what it once was. Sometimes the apology never comes. Sometimes life takes away the future you had carefully planned. And sometimes, you have no choice but to stop trying to repair the past and start healing yourself instead.

One of my greatest teachers in this journey was my daughter. Raising a child with special needs was not something I had prepared for. Like many parents, I began with expectations about how life would unfold. Life had different plans. There were challenges I could not fix, struggles I could not make disappear, and days filled with worry, exhaustion, guilt, and uncertainty. Slowly, I learned that my role was not to fix everything. My role was to love, support, adapt, and grow. In that process, I discovered that healing often begins when we stop fighting reality and start embracing it.

Then cancer arrived. At 29, I was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. Once again, life presented me with something I could not simply fix. The surgery could remove a tumour. The treatment could fight the disease. But neither could instantly heal the fear, the grief, the loss of confidence, or the emotional scars that followed. Those things required patience, time, and compassion toward myself. For years, I believed strength meant pushing through pain. Today, I think strength is something gentler. Strength is allowing yourself to heal. It is understanding that healing is not forgetting what happened; it is learning how to carry what happened without letting it carry you.

Looking back, I realise I did not fix my life—I healed it. Piece by piece. I healed from disappointments, fear, self-doubt, and the belief that my worth depended on other people's approval. As I healed, something unexpected happened. Joy returned. Confidence returned. Purpose returned. Not because life became perfect, but because I stopped waiting for perfection before allowing myself to live.

Today, when I look at the woman I have become, I do not see someone whose life was fixed. I see someone who healed. Someone who learned that broken things can still be beautiful. Someone who discovered that scars do not make us weaker—they remind us of how much we survived.

Because all things cannot be fixed. Some need healing.

— Farida ❤️