The story of Muniya… the beggar boy.

My Mom had finished cooking a delicious breakfast for all of us and was now busy washing clothes. I was sitting nearby studying for my exams, when a pathetic voice called “Ammmaaaaa………………..”. The tone was so irritating that it made me forget what I was studying. After sometime the voice called out in more pathetic and worse voice which killed Kannada mercilessly, “I am very hungry. I haven’t eaten anything since morning. Give me some food”. My Mom told the person to move on but the voice kept irritating us. Finally I opened the door and found very dirty, smelly and ugly bucktoothed boy standing there with an old milk powder tin box which was as dirty as his clothes, begging for food. He must have been around 11-12 yrs old. My mom as usual felt sad for the kid and told me to hand over whatever was left of the morning breakfast for the boy. I was not the one to put down the book under normal condition, but his pathetic irritating voice had me run inside to do whatever to get rid of him. I did not feel like dropping the food into the dirty tin box so wrapped it in a newspaper and handed it out to him. He immediately sat on our steps and started to gobble down the food. When finished he asked for some more. Mom told me to give him previous night’s leftovers too. So I was serving this boy instead of studying for my exams. I kept cursing him but something about him was sad and it had me serving him rice and sambhar again. In no time he finished all the food and thanked my Mom, though I was the one who had served him.

Time kept ticking away and for some silly reason we found him standing there, without budging or going away on his begging mission. My mom asked him what he wanted and he said he was still hungry. I almost fell out my chair. He had eaten food enough for three men and was still hungry. My mom felt sad for him and asked him if he would work for his food. He said yes. She then had a lengthy chat with him asking him about his parents etc. We were never interested in his story and for short got to know that his parents were both drunkards and took away all his money when he went home. She told him to go home and tell them that he will not be coming home frequently hereafter, but will pay them some money at the end of the month. He went away happily. He was back in the evening. I could not imagine having this boy inside our home and for once everyone shared my feelings. Mom shut all of us by saying that everything turned absolutely clean if you put water on it by reciting “kaleema” and so he was sent into the bathroom with a bar of soap. He had his bath and came out looking as dirty as he was earlier. He was sent back in there again and now was handed coconut coir to scrub himself with. He came back again looking a bit cleaner and was sent back again to clean himself. Finally we saw he was not brown but a very black kid with jet black hair and yellow teeth. Finally mom poured water on him reciting Kaleema and brought him in. He looked totally different in clothes my Mom had given him.

He came from very low caste and people were not happy that my mother was keeping him in our house. But Mom said a person is a person no matter what caste they belonged to and it is the society that made them into lesser human beings than us. My dad was not happy with this decision mom had made but ended up surrendering to Mom’s wishes as usual.

We got to know his name to be Muniya. No one mingled with him much. I was preparing for my 6^th std examination and had no time for anyone. My brother and younger sister were sort of scared of a beggar boy who had all of sudden become Mommy’s pet. My elder sister was always busy chatting away with her friends. Unknown to any one of us slowly Muniya had made for himself a special place in my mom’s heart and he turned out to be a very caring person when it came to my Mom. He would always eat dinner making sure my mom had enough to eat. We never knew that at times mom would feed everyone and if nothing was left would go to bed on empty stomach. No one ever checked out how much food she had cooked. At times we would eat more and nothing would be left but sometimes no one ate properly so lot of food was left over. Mom had trouble measuring out tummies and if dad found out that food was being wasted he wound make a huge fuss of it. So mom usually went to bed without food if everything was finished instead of cooking for herself again. It was Muniya who started checking out if she had something left for dinner or not and if not he would not eat his share too. It was time for all of us to hang our heads in shame. We did.
The stray dogs in our locality began to lose some weight, because the ever hungry Muniya would finish up anything that was left in the night. Mom did not have to face the wrath of dad for throwing away food anymore.

All the day he would run around my mom helping her with the work. Slowly we forgot he was a dirty beggar boy and started to treat him with some respect. My brother taught him to ride bicycle. I started to teach him Kannada alphabets. Soon he became a part of our family. Once in a month he would take his salary. We did not know how much Mom paid him but it was good enough to keep his parents quite and happy. They never ever bothered to check out on him. He would have a bath before coming in after handing over his salary.

When the touring studio came to our town he wanted to take few pictures of him. Mom dressed him up very neatly and sent him with my brother and sister to have his photograph taken. He looked very funny posing on the motorbike, standing with a tie etc. Even to this day I wonder what a great bond had formed between my mom and Muniya. She would feed him and take care of him like she took care of us and he in turn cared for her as though he was her own son. Not once did anyone find him cheating on us in any way.

My dad did not appreciate him to the end. Muniya would take food for my brother and sister during lunch period. It was then that my younger sister would pester him to bring her back home with her. She would sit on the cycle carrier and refuse to get down. Many times she would come back home during lunch period. Teachers informed my dad about this and he was furious. My sister got mild punishment and Muniya a bit harsher. He was warned that he should not listen to my sister. Few days went by with my sister staying back in school without fuss. But after a few months she started pestering him again. He was terrified of my dad and firmly refused her. Few days later she won the battle with him and came back home after lunch. Muniya handed over the cycle, and went away never to be seen by us again. My mom was very sad and sent someone to fetch him back from home but they informed us that he had come home and told them that he is not working in our home anymore and they should not bother my Mom asking about his whereabouts but had gone away after that. Days went by and we stopped expecting him to come back. My mom would think of him very often and wonder where he was.

One day when I was going to college a lorry suddenly stopped in front of me and a young man jumped down and rushed towards me. I was very scared at first but then I saw the bucktoothed smile and realized it was Muniya. He told me to tell my mom that he was very sorry and ashamed that he had left home in this manner. He could not go back to his begging ways and so had found himself a job as a cleaner for lorry and was travelling all over India. I asked him whether he stopped reading. He said he continued to read Kannada and could read better than the driver. I asked him to come over and meet mom but he said he could not do that after leaving home abruptly.

Mom was very happy to know he was doing good. Much later when I was taking my son for a walk I met him again. He was driving the lorry now. He did come over finally to meet my mom. She did not ask him why he had left abruptly neither he told her why. He told her about his job etc and went his way after getting her blessing and his childhood photos. We never saw him again because we changed house and he may never have got our new address.

Whenever people talk about my Mom, they mention her wisdom, her generosity, her extravagance ways, her sweet talk which made people do silly things and at times her cunning ways too. What we all have forgotten is how much love she had for children. Even the beggars or street children could make her heart melt.

I had seen this side of her in my younger days and even to this day I feel so proud thinking of the good deed my Mom had done back then. She had, silently, in a small way washed away the stigma of untouchable from the life of a boy and given him a new identity. Back in those days it was very brave thing to do.

Hats off to you mommy. I am so proud of you... 

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Sporting Memories... that will always last.

Sports were never the same with our new P.T. Sir (that was how everyone addressed him, including the teachers). He made the kids sweat on the field. He was very strict but at the same time good trainer. Many kids who never participated in physical activities were pulled into the games by him. He never allowed any excuse until he was sure that it was genuine one.

I used to give excuse of my club foot and not play much in school and never participated in the mass drill they organized every Saturday. I never wanted to be in competitions where others could mock my club foot or beat me badly in games. I played alone.

The new trainer told me I had to do as much as possible and take rest if I truly had pain in my leg. We had a little argument but he won because he knew I used to walk quite long distance to school at times instead of waiting for the bus and also when I wanted to, I played quite well. For once there was a person who could not see my disability. To him I was like any other kid. He made me sweat it out and run like everyone.

He guided me to walk with less limp which is a whole different story. P.T. sir showed special interest In training me and with his encouragement I was lured into participating in more sports. I found out to my amazement I could actually beat other kids in hop and catch, throw ball, dodge ball and kho-kho.

Slowly I realized the bull chasing episode where I had overtaken my sister was not a fluke and I could actually beat many kids in running. It came as a big surprise to everyone around me and I was utterly shocked. I was beaming with happiness and pride off course.

The school competitions were coming up and P.T. Sir told me to participate in running for my category.  I had qualified for the sports meet to be held in a village nearby called Vartur. I was full of gratitude for the man who had helped me overcome my disability and said “Thank you sir”. He smiled and told me something which I remember even to this day when I have to fight a battle, “I am not sure about your legs girl, but your spirit is going to take you far”.

We kept practicing hard for the sports meet where most of the schools from our district were participating. For once my books were ignored. I did not want to let my school down. Between the hectic schedules of sports preparation the days flew by and we were in Vartur.

. “Good” he said and I heard his voice was emotional. I looked up and saw two droplets of tears his eyes. Then my emotions became clear and I knew I had won. Second place was not sucking any more.

Even to this day I remember those droplets of tears and this gesture from Sir is more precious than any medal I could ever win…..

I wish my phone had the feature – to utter the magic words “ They have found a cure”.

Doctors had told me that my daughter was born with multiple disabilities. It is not easy for a mom to accept the fact that her child is exceptional and will have challenges doing simple activities. It was very tough on me to accept the fact that my 2 month old daughter was suffering from some kind of atrophy to her brain which had taking away her ability to see. The effect the brain atrophy would have on her life was not known then but it was clear that she had no vision. My cute little baby who looked so healthy with beautiful eyes had no vision and suffered from some unknown terrible malady which could take away more of her much needed abilities was unacceptable to me. The VEP proved she had no vision.

I was feeding my daughter and the phone started to ring. The landline went on tring tring for some time and then paused. I wanted to finish with the task on hand first and then attend to the phone. It started to ring again. I put up daughter down and attended to the call.

Caller : Is this Farida Rizwan?

Me : yeah

Caller : Ma’am, I am receptionist from the hospital calling. You had been here last week and doctor said your child was not normal. She says there has been mistake in the diagnosis and they regret it. Your daughter is absolutely fine and there is no need to worry.

Me: OH MY GOD! I knew it. I knew there had been a mistake. Thank you so much …

I left the phone hanging and ran to my daughter but slipped and woke up to the dark night engulfing me. It was still night and I was dreaming. My two kids were sleeping as though there was nothing wrong with the world around them.

Life moved on with harsh reality of life and another reality of life was breast cancer. Did not even give me chance to recover from the shock of my daughters diagnosis. Surgery, chemotherapy along with support from my kids and family pushed me on. Yet there was no way to be sure that the demon would not come back.

I was in my native place and having my lunch when my Nokia 1100 started ringing the tune of Dhoom.. I picked it up and had my brother on the line. He was calling from Bangalore.

Brother : Hi Fari. I have a good news for you!

Me : what?

Brother : I need you to sit down before I tell this to you.

Me : OK OK !!! I am sitting down. Please tell me soon. Did you get some good job?

Brother : Doctor told me today that they have finally found a cure for Farheena. All she needs is a medicine to be administered to her for 3 months and then she is going to be able to walk, talk, read and write like any one of us.

Me : It is like dream come true.. Oh God! I am leaving for Bangalore today.

I put the phone down and tried to finish the last two morsels of food lying on my place but then choked on it. I closed my eyes and then opened them into utter darkness of night. So the dream had remained to be just the dream. It had not come true. My kids like usual were sleeping as though nothing was amiss in their lives.

The dream went on and as my phones kept changing the only aspect was the tone the look of the phone that changed. How much we steel ourselves to the reality, love of kid never lets you stop wishing and those wishes manifest as a dream for me. Always!

I was looking at the new touch screen phone which I had won online. I felt so proud announcing to my facebook friends that I was writing my status through the one touch phone I had won online. As I was looking at the key pad to find the right words I saw the screen lighting up and announcing an incoming call. It was a call from USA. My friend Paula was calling from her cell phone. As she was having tough time I got worried.

Me : Hi, how are you Pee?

Paula : I am fine. Actually you need to come back to USA as soon as possible. There has been a breakthrough in the medicine and they have found a way to treat Farheena. She is going to gain her full mobility, speaking skills etc. What do you think?

Me: OH God!! I knew they could do it…

And then all of the sudden everything goes blank and it is totally dark. I wonder what happened during midday to create such darkness and then I realize I was still dreaming.

Phone change but the wish remains the same…. Life goes on!

Find a cure for Cancer

It is not easy to live in fear

The TRUTH.. it hurt but healed!!!

It is not easy for a mom to accept the fact that her child is exceptional and will have challenges doing simple activities. It was very tough on me to accept the fact that my 2 month old daughter was suffering from some kind of atrophy to her brain which had taking away her ability to see. The effect the brain atrophy would have on her life was not known then but it was clear that she had no vision. My cute little baby who looked so healthy with beautiful eyes had no vision and suffered from some unknown terrible malady which could take away more of her much needed abilities was unacceptable to me. The VEP proved she had no vision.

Somewhere they are making a mistake, the machine must be faulty, they are not efficient enough for this tests.. my heart ran various tapes, where as it was me in the first place who had observed that my daughter was not making eye contact when I breast fed her. I was quite stressed and always tensed. My daughter stopped laughing and smiling … she even started feeding less and less. Panic struck me with the thought that may be the demon lurking in her has gained more power. May be I will lose her. What will I do if she just starts slipping from my hands? I felt so helpless and sad most of the time. Then I saw that my son was not smiling much anymore and he was not eating well too. Common sense took over and told me that the demon did not have any power over him, so why he is behaving like my daughter. Truth dawned on me that it was my tension and panic of the last 40 days that has been rubbing off on my children. I could not believe that my baby who was 3 months old could actually respond to my stress and tension. I thought of changing myself.. I had to give it a try. I built up enough courage and said to myself ‘Yes, my child is not an average person, she is exception. She may have difficulty facing the world and I being weak and sympathetic will only put more hurdles in her path. I am not going to let that happen. We are going to fight the odds against us together. I am going to take it all one day at a time and give unconditional love to my children I will make sure that I will never make my son suffer because he is normal or if he is not. He will get all the attention and love he deserves.

It may look simple here when I type it but back then, it took a lot of courage on my part to say it even to myself that my child will live with special needs. Soon enough this small acceptance of fact made a lot of difference to all of us. All the false hope I carried of getting up one fine morning and finding out that the doctors had made a mistake, or they calling me to say a medicine has be invented to cure her every problem were flushed out. It was painful to flush it out but once done the stink it carried was gone. I took a deep breath and started to look for positive points in her along with accepting the negative ones. I could enjoy her company without being tensed and soon my baby started being her self. Smiling, playing, feeding and loving me. My son too came out of the shell he was withdrawing himself into on seeing Maa always occupied with his new sibling. He started helping me to feed her, dress her etc and the routine continues till today. With tears in eyes I thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful son who has always put the interest of his sister ahead of him. He understands her enough to be able to guide me in taking good care of her when I have faltered in maintaining the balance of love and discipline. Miracles did happen one by one.. slowly and I did not even realize they were miracles. She gained eye sight at the age of 11 months. I was sure she could see though the doctors refused to believe me in the beginning. She started to sit, crawl and the age of 5 could walk with support. I never asked for miracles anymore but never quit trying. The toughest part came when soon after rejoicing her vision I had to deal with breast cancer. Fear, tension and panic attacked once again and the impact was soon visible on my children. So I pulled myself together once again, and took everything in my stride calmly. I am not going die was my resolution and here I am … keeping my word.

My daughter is growing up into a lovely woman; she has gained few skills which we never expected from her……. slowly. At times she amazes me with her memory by finding lost things. She knows exactly where the keys are lol. She can communicate with us very well though she has not gained command over all the words. Above all she feels love and affection for everyone and everything around her. Putting the phone down hard means I hurt it… for her everything from a pillow to slippers has pain cells. Anyone who has loved her has got it back multiplied in three folds. Going to be fifteen soon she is still a baby.. who is not capable of sins. Back then her condition looked like a curse to me.. but today I have a vision to see the real curse people face. Hatred, jealousy, lust etc is making demons of us. When I read the daily news, though it is almost same everyday it never ceases to shock me. Chaos rules the world at the moment and hatred for trifle reasons like colour of skin, the way people are, the way people worship etc anything goes to create hatred. Greed is also so prevalent where parents themselves have burnt a girl alive for material gains, lust, rapes- the papers are full of horror tales. Isn’t that a curse on us? Who are the people under that curse? The ones who are considered normal and intelligent by our society.

I no more feel the need for a change though I agree it hurts to see her struggle doing everyday chores. She yearns for activities which we all take for granted. But at the same time she is free of the curse and stands as a symbol of purity… She is a precious special child who deserves all the love I can give her and more…………..

Short Poems...

Trying for comeback to the blogging world.. I have missed you fellow bloggers.

Long ago when I was young I used to write short stanza's using Idioms ... I have categorized them as In love and Out of Love Hope you will enjoy reading them and also welcome to make fun of me... I don't take pride in them. LOL




DEFENCE OFFENCE
At birth we acquire the right
That ourselves by all means we can defend
So I speak up to defend my virtue
I am sorry in the process if someone I offend


BEHIND THE MASK
To reveal all the scars life has given me
Is a difficult task
So to hide the ugliness and to look beautiful
I always hide behind a mask


MY HEART IS IN RIGHT PLACE
Take heart, surely I will not take part
In this abusive race
You should have known by now
That my heart is in right place


SCARS ON ME
Love is injurious to health
On me it has left many scars
Whenever I venture out now
I am asked have you been at wars.


HOPING AGAINST HOPE
I waited for you to come to me
Poor me!! I was hoping against hope
I kept my eyes open in bath
And ended up filling them up with soap

A HOT HEAD
When someone say something against you
Your voice shoots up and your eyes turn red
So now I fear to go against you
And say the truth that you are a hot head


WANT SOME HELP
WOW!! You do things with air
Never oh! Never do you take my help
Whatever you may start to do
You end up making an ass of yourself


Some more of them

and a few more

Finally we arrived in USA...

Kids on the plane (pssstt... watch that boy)

I always wanted to share my dream trip with my friends and now a competition called "Jiyo Life Moments" Sponsored by Club Mahindra and Indiblogger has pushed me into doing this.

If possible help me out by posting some comments and voting for me on the indiblogger

I was worried about my kids reaction to their first flight. They were cool in the beginning.

Farheena started to feel uncomfortable after a while and refused to eat anything. Rayyan in his excitement of taking pictures somehow messed with the mobile phone and the SIM was lost. I was a bit panicky at this because I had no way to get in touch with Paula now after we were to land in USA. I was angry but got control over myself before I said anything. I told myself he was excited and nervous and I should not spoil the memories of his first flight by being angry or scolding him. So I had to calm down and do whatever I had to do when the time would come. We landed in Dubai and had a break of 2 hours there. There we met a couple from Germany in the waiting room. The woman had fractured her leg on her visit to India. Farheena had vomited on the plane earlier and now refused to eat anything. I had a small chat with Rizwan who had torrents of advice for me.

Back into the jet and we were leaving for NYC. I could not actually believe that this was happening but it was. I had seen the pictures of JFK airport and it sort of overwhelmed me with its enormousness. I wondered how would we ever know what terminal to get into for our FL flight.

I knew it would terrify the kids if they knew I was worried, so I had to be the jolly mom on tour of USA and that I was. The invisible help was at hand as we found a very nice person in JFK who guided us and helped us out a lot. At the port of entry I was hit by another wave of nervousness where I recalled the soothsayers words which had warned me about being sent back to India from that point if they felt we should not be visiting USA. But we were asked just a few questions and soon were given permission to enter the country of USA.

Finally we WERE in USA! Meanwhile the woman who was supposed to push Farheena’s wheelchair had vanished somewhere. The officer who had helped us earlier was back on seeing me pushing the wheelchair and walking aimlessly ;). Though an officer he was willing to push Farheena’s wheelchair around though we did not ask for his help. In fact we said we could manage it but he insisted. He guided us to pick up our luggage, get it cleared in the customs etc. This person who was going about doing his duty never knew what it meant for us and how much difference he made to our trip. Finally we were put in a taxi which would take us to the terminal where we were to board the flight to FL and I saw him pay the taxi driver the fare and tip also. He told us not to pay anything for the taxi at all. After thanking him we said bye to him.

At the airport I tried to get some tea (the mamooli chai ) or coffee for Farheena as I was worried about her being dehydrated. I saw a coffee shop and as the flight was 3 hours away I decided to go and bring some coffee for Farheena. To my horror the food in a café looked so different and expensive. My mind which always thought in Indian currency refused to accept the prizes on the eatables there LOL. Now I wish I had someone to guide me there as I thought I would get a coffee (ie with milk and sugar) when I ask for it. But all I got was black coffee without sugar or milk. Farheena refused to even look at the cup so I tried it and went cough cough puke puke… eeewwwwww. So I went back there looking for sugar and milk which I found in small sachets. I thought it was very funny. I did not like the coffee but gulped it down because I was not about to waste the money I had spent on it ;). Finally we got on the flight and landed in Tampa.

Once in Tampa we just went with the person who pushed Farheena’s wheel chair and he left us near the airport door where people were picking up their friends or relatives and asked for a tip of 3$ . I had some change with me (from the coffee shop) and so paid him. We waited there for 20 minutes or so and then Rayyan suggested for me to get inside and look for Paula as we were sure she would not be late. So in I went looking for her. It was getting late and the airport wore a deserted look. A lady was sweeping the floors and I asked her how to use the telephone. Luckily I knew Paula’s number by heart. I asked for change but she paid for the call and told me it is OK. As I was talking to Paula I was surprised to hear her voice so clear. I was amazed how different phones are in USA as I could hear her as though she was talking to me standing right there in front of me where a woman stood wearing purple dress talking in her phone. As I was talking to Paula I could see her lip move to the words being said in the phone. The told the woman who was cleaning that may be I had found my friend as I think it the woman talking into the phone right there in front of me was actually the person talking to me over the phone.

She said to me “ If that is your friend then you better find her because she has looked past you four times and I don’t think she is ever going to find you”. So I shouted “ Pee, here I am”. The rest you can watch on the video.

The placard she was supposed to hold was brought out after she met us.. it was beautiful...

To be continued.

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A dream of a middle class Indian girl...

I have been wanting to share my story of my travel to USA with my friends for a long time now but have been procrastinating actually doing it but the now I have a reason to do it for the contest on Jiyo Life moments on Indiblogger. This cannot be said in one blog so I am going to dedicate a few blogs for this happy moments in the life of me and my kids.
Paula started it with the story she sent to my daughter. Now you can see how this all started....

I fell in love with cartoons a long long time ago.. and I am still deeply in love with them. My childhood was filled with dreams of playing with Mickey, Donald, Tom and Jerry etc. Once I read about a land called Disney World where you could be in the world of fairy tales, cartoons etc. Naturally I wanted to go there immediately but then, it is an impossible dream for a middle class Indian girl who had never been outside Karnataka.

Though impossible I never threw out my dream … I held on to it. I grew up got married and had children. Then I realized there had been additions to my dream. I wanted to visit Disney World with my kids. Even then it was near impossible dream for a middle class Indian woman who lived in small house in rural India without running water, washing machine T.V. or any other basic necessities which is more needed than a foreign travel.

I always said the word impossible itself says I- M- Possible. Why should I not hold on to it.

Life goes on… and it goes on a very bumpy road. I had cancer, I survived, lost my mother and sister to cancer, went through depression etc etc.. but the thread of the dream was always there in my hand, entangled with my fingers.

When I felt very lonely I tried to reach out to people for sharing my pain of dealing with cancer. People reached out to me and for some reason they were from other part of the globe. We got close and one of my sister of hearts bonded with my kids through webcam. My daughter fell in love with Paula aunty.

Once when we were discussing our dreams on support board I mentioned my dream of visiting Disney World. Paula told us that if we could travel to Florida then we could stay with her. The dream was just plane tickets, passport and visa away now. Disney World was not the whole attraction for us now. We had good friends to meet in USA. Meeting them meant much more than meeting the cartoons.

MONEY was the biggest problem.. Unfortunately we and our friends had big dreams and big hearts with quite small purse. So first the question was from where to arrange the money. Our house needed a renovation but we decided to skip it for the sake of our USA trip. The biggest miracle was my husband agreeing to send us to USA and also arrange the money ( off course by skipping the renovation or precisely the much needed repairs)

. Then came the question of getting our passports. It got done too. For that I had to collect my TC from college after 22 years. LOL. We had soothsayers everywhere and they were predicting our future for free. All were of the opinion that it was nearly impossible for us to get visa for USA. To add to our woes my kids (both of them) got chicken pox two days before we were supposed to leave for our interview to the US embassy and the interview had to be postponed.

Finally when we arrived, we were nervous but the people at the embassy were too nice. The person who interviewed us abruptly cut the interview short and told us we could go. We were shocked and thought we have been refused visa but he assured us he had no problem sanctioning visa to us… He could see the joy on our faces as we did not hide it. My friends had written wonderful letters to the embassy pleading with them to grant us visa and I treasure that even now.. I know I am not going to be praised that highly ever in my life again. At least not by Duffy Mathias in the way she had done in the letter to the embassy.

Paula and me discussed about many things and among them was her pet dogs who she told us would leap on us to greet us. Farheena was terrified of dogs and we had to find a way to deal with this. The brainwashing began with showing Farheena the pics of dogs and telling her how different they were from the street dogs we have here. We traveled by train to Mumbai and there we had already arranged for a taxi driver from our native village to pick us up. He was waiting for us at the railway station but the VT station was too big for Farheena to cover the distance and get to the Taxi stand. There was no wheel chair available. The coolie came up with the idea of making her sit on top of our luggage. Farheena gave us a strong NO!. We asked her to decide whether she wanted to meet Paula aunty or not. She quietly got on top of the suitcases. I tried to take a picture of her but could not get a clear picture because everyone was hurrying. Me and Rayyan had tough time not laughing at the sight but if we laughed out loud we knew there would be two murders that night.

We went a bit sight seeing in Mumbai. By then we had seen that someone was working miracles for us and everything was being laid down perfectly for us to tread on and reach our destination. At 4 a.m. we were on board of Emirates and were flying towards NYC. Could not believe I was visiting USA with my two kids but I was… I was going to FL, the state where Disney World was but we were not excited about it as we were about meeting our friends there.

To be Continued.

Guest post by Paula Gerding....

A VERY WONDERFUL STORY

Once upon a time in a land far from Spring Hill, Florida there lived a wonderful girl named

Farheena. Farheena was also a very stubborn girl!

If Farheenaa decided that she did not want to do something not even a monsoon could make her change her mind. It was this very wonderful (but stubborn) girl who decided that she wanted to go to Spring Hill, Florida to see her Paula Aunty. In fact, Farheena, even though it scared her and excited her at the same time, knew that the only way to

get to see her Paula Aunty was to fly in a huge airplane. She knew she had to cross over many lands and mony oceans and seas but that did not even stop her from wanting to go see her Paula Aunty. Not even the 4 dogs that lived with Paula Aunty were enough to make her change her mind! Now this was one brave girl!

And so the journey began. This meant Maa had to work some of her special “Maa magic” and first get passports and then visa's and then airplane tickets. All of this required many, many rupees...mor rupee's than Farheena could ever imagine!!! But, Maa being a wonderful Maa who also wanted to go see her friend Pee and Rayyan also wanted to go see Paula Aunty so Maa just had to work her magic and the wonderful trip began.

It was a rough start on the trip. Our poor heroine got sick on the plane and had a nasty infection that made her ear hurt and she just felt terrible. Ohhhh, would things EVER get any better? It took time but things did get better. Farheena, Maa and Rayyan all had a wonderful time visiting Spring Hill, Florida; other parts of Florida, Disney World, Philadelphia and NYC!!!

They met many wonderful people, all of whom fell in love with them and with whom they had a good time. Farheena particuarly had fun shopping! Shopping and going in the car! I don't think there was a girl in the entire world who loved going in the car more than Farheena! The time finally came for Farheena, Maa, and Rayyan to go home. It was hard to leave and Farheena was not happy about leaving. Luckily the plane ride home was MUCH better for Farheena as she and her family took many, many souvenirs home from America to show to their friends.

Sadly, Farheena was not happy once she returned home. She did not like the way they would lose their electricity for hours on end. She did not like the heat or the dirt that got all over her and she missed wearing her American clothes. She really missed her friends whom she had made in Spring Hill, Florida (Spring Hill, Florida misses her too!).

Being a very stubborn girl, Farheena would not let anyone forget how unhappy she was (“If we were with Paula Aunty we would have electricity now.”). Farheena also missed going in the car and going shopping very much! But there was one fantastic thing that Farheena learned (maybe the most fantastic thing)...because of her trip to Spring Hill, Florida. Farheena learned how to really talk! She could talk so that others could understand her. She was making sentences and asking full questions. Also, Farheena was walking soooo much better than she had before she came to Spring Hill, Florida. In fact, Farheena got to go back to school and she became an excellent student who won awards for being such a good student. Farheena also had done some very serious growing up when in Spring Hill, Florida and had become even prettier than she had been before she came (although that seemed almost impossible as she was already beautiful!). In fact, this was a new Farheena that no one had seen ever before in her land. And so begins the excitement! One day Farheena will be back in America, the land that she learned to love and the land that loved her. Paula Aunty and Jay Uncle hope that when that day comes they will be able to give Farheena the biggest hug in the whole wide world to make up for all of the lost hugs because she had to return to India. Lots of Love,

Aunty Pee

Can't believe it has been 14 years since I last saw my sister

Actually we think death is the end. But is it? I don’t know. It was never so when I lost my sister more than a decade ago. It was the beginning of something painful and sense of loss.We grew up together and almost shared everything. My younger brother is 6 years younger to me so we had a lot of time for ourselves before other siblings intervened in our lives. We always had everything shared between us, an apple would be cut into equal half and we would each have a piece. Off course my sister believed in being fair and so it was the person who did not cut the apple (or whatever it was) that got to pick the piece and we would have to cut them alternately.
We were just opposite of each other. Nothing was ever similar between us. We liked different books (ooopppsss I mean I loved books whereas my sister never could read beyond 3 pages at one go), movies, colors, God, food etc etc. We fought over every single thing. She would flare up very fast, and would cool down faster. If I ever succeeded in getting her to beat me in her anger; than I was winner. I could work her around to do many things for me as a consolation. I enjoyed that. I wouldn’t flare up easily but was tenacious, and teased her temper a lot.
I never knew how good these things were until much much later when she was not there physically.Everyone always said she was all beauty and me all brains. The most touching part I remember about her is when we two would start fighting and someone would interfere and try to shut me up, (I was tenacious) and later they would end up scolding me and she would jump in to defend me. I thought that was funny back then but now I am finding it wrings out a lot of tears from me. She loved games, gossip, friends, Movies and outings. Picnics were her favorites. I loved books, studying etc. She would play to have fun where as I played to win, to prove myself always. Even with a club foot I could be very fast runner and excelled in throw ball and many other games. She would never play games where there was competition. She loved funny games.
My lovely sister was also opposite to me in another approach which proved fatal and she paid with her life. She never liked the pills, pricks or doctors. Hospitals were one of the worst places for her and would always postpone treatment as far as possible. I always trusted doctors a lot. One day she announced she felt some lump in her breast and I panicked. At that time I did not know much about BC but still was aware of it and advised her to see a doctor. She said she would. But never did it. I kept reminding her again and again. But I knew she was not interested in consulting doctor. I went to my native place where she was on a visit with my Mother and convinced her to come to the doctors with me. The doctor had just one look and advised biopsy. She said lets come back tomorrow and that went on for few more days. I almost physically dragged her into going for a biopsy and the result said breast cancer. I was shocked. Couldn’t believe what I heard. My parents immediately took her to some more doctors and they all advised surgery, radiation and chemotherapy for her. But she refused. Wouldn’t give in to any pressure we tried to put on her. No one knew she would be gone the next year. She talked my family into believing about miracle healing. I never gave up convincing her to go for surgery. But all was in vain. I can vividly recall how cancer took over her slowly. It is really very terrifying. The lump grew and then opened into a wound which went on covering half her chest. She always cleaned it up herself and dressed it till the end. She was really amazing. Again I was away from her when I heard one day that she was dead. It did not make any sense to me. I expected that but still couldn’t believe it. She left some huge hollow inside me, which yearned to be filled up. I searched for friends. I reached out to people, finding few sisters who filled it in drops. Still the gap needs to be filled. It still hurts so bad. I do miss her so much. I still cant imagine a person who was so full of life gave it up so easily. She just resigned off life when she heard the word cancer.
The one thing about her life that hurts me the most is, the day she got to know I had cancer too. It attacked her right breast and my left one. I joked it was the result of sharing everything but I could see the pain in her. She slowly started sobbing and then cried piteously. Why both of us? She asked again and again. She just broke after that. I still remember and feel the hug she gave me when I left to get myself operated. I was walking out of gate when she came there and hugged me and wept. That was something very touching and can bring tears whenever I remember it. I just felt the love flow from her to me. We again proved to be opposites. She gave up and lost her life where as I fought it out( the odds were very much against me) and survived. I feel guilty of not sharing something with her there. Does she know the pain I suffer whenever I think of her? Would she change the decision if she knew I was going to suffer so? I look up to everyone to find her. There have been many people who have given me a part of her.I have found so many sisters of hearts. They are not blood relation to me but we share the feelings and pain of our heart. We can emphatise with each other. But still the pain of losing a sister remains. No matter what changes takes place. Can we really lose someone after having found them and loved them? Does someone has an answer? I am searching…….