I have been on the receiving end of emotional blackmail for a long time - it is very hard not to give in to it. But I will do everything in my power not to turn into a blackmailer myself x
Very insightful post and I think you are definitely right about learning to recognise this in ourselves too. I have been on the receiving end of this but if I am honest I probably have been guilty too in the past without realising it. And I agree if a relationship is meant to be it will last.
Farila, another meaningful post! I've been on the receiving end of this, myself.I'm honest to say that it's really hard not to give in to it. And as always tell my friends, if a relationship is worthwile or meant to be it'll definitely lasts. Sending love and hugs your way:) Betty xx
Different views for things.. Loved the way u have given the insight on this. It happens with everyone at some or the other point of life. Just make urself strong enough so dat u arent always at the other end.
there is a fine difference between being assertive and being an emotional blackmailer... I think the balance is very difficult to maintain bcoz priorities change so often...great topic tackled well, I must say
I have been the victim of this trojan horse many a times....but then nothing can be done. you cannot pass through this killing virus with flying colours. there are definitely gonna be atleast some side effects. anyway...a good post farida...!!
I totally agree with you on this post, and you know what I'm going through right at this minute. Many times I have just felt like giving up, but twice before I have totally ended my blogs because of these people, or in this case a certain person who at the moment is making my life pure Hell. I just avoid these people, and I find it hard to believe that there are at least two people that are writing right now who are so anti-English! Now I just make sure that I check these people out properly, but I cannot stop them from writing about me on other blogs, which is the really sad thing. I wonder if they know how much these people are hurting their victims, and how pure nasty and selfish that they really are. I have done nothing to harm anyone, and I never would, but still, little drops of poison are dripped into others ears. It got to the point where I changed my e-mail address because I started getting nasty mails from a person who didn't like my poetry! So what...they weren't forced to read it! I'm pleased that you have brought this subject up because it goes on far more than you would expect it to, and right now, I can do without this. Big, big hugs!
Aren't we as mothers, as women at a disadvantage because intrinsically our role, our softer self calls for us to be constantly on the receiving end. We have to give more and take less.
For ourselves we must learn to take the risk or forever have this hanging round our necks.
It is often practised in a Joint-Family setup prevalent in India. The relatives always try and exploit the well to do by resorting to words that sound like endearment but reeking of greed and shameless falsehood. Excellent read madam.
There was a long time that I felt my husband didn't love me. I don't think I ever said "If you love me, you'll do this." But I think I said something along the lines of "I feel you don't love me because you....."
That's the thing though. What if someone does (or doesn't) do something that TRULY makes the person feel they're not loved. Is it blackmail to mention it?
This is such a perceptive, helpful post, Farida. And timely, too, because it is holiday season here, when a lot of emotional blackmail seems to rise up to steal our attention from the real meaning of our holidays.
There's no question it's a form of emotional abuse, and the scars are unseen, but can be long-lasting.
im being eb for 8 years now carnt last much longer she has a terminly ill child witch beleave it or not she uses the little guy for eb gain i think this is eb at its highest level i need help
Beautifully written. I guess all of us have at one time or the other encountered at least one of these kinds. Your post gives one lots of time to think and reflect. Thanks.
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I have been on the receiving end of emotional blackmail for a long time - it is very hard not to give in to it. But I will do everything in my power not to turn into a blackmailer myself x
ReplyDeleteVery insightful post and I think you are definitely right about learning to recognise this in ourselves too. I have been on the receiving end of this but if I am honest I probably have been guilty too in the past without realising it. And I agree if a relationship is meant to be it will last.
ReplyDeleteKate xx
Farila, another meaningful post!
ReplyDeleteI've been on the receiving end of this, myself.I'm honest to say that it's really hard not to give in to it.
And as always tell my friends, if a relationship
is worthwile or meant to be it'll definitely lasts.
Sending love and hugs your way:)
Betty xx
Different views for things..
ReplyDeleteLoved the way u have given the insight on this.
It happens with everyone at some or the other point of life.
Just make urself strong enough so dat u arent always at the other end.
Regards
Nuts
I totally agree. I have been a part of an EB's plan of action but after years of dealing with it, I found the courage to get out.
ReplyDeleteI try hard to be careful that none of my actions be misconstrued as EB. I know what it feels like and I would never hurt anyone that way I was hurt.
there is a fine difference between being assertive and being an emotional blackmailer... I think the balance is very difficult to maintain bcoz priorities change so often...great topic tackled well, I must say
ReplyDeleteI have been the victim of this trojan horse many a times....but then nothing can be done. you cannot pass through this killing virus with flying colours. there are definitely gonna be atleast some side effects.
ReplyDeleteanyway...a good post farida...!!
I totally agree with you on this post, and you know what I'm going through right at this minute.
ReplyDeleteMany times I have just felt like giving up, but twice before I have totally ended my blogs because of these people, or in this case a certain person who at the moment is making my life pure Hell. I just avoid these people, and I find it hard to believe that there are at least two people that are writing right now who are so anti-English!
Now I just make sure that I check these people out properly, but I cannot stop them from writing about me on other blogs, which is the really sad thing.
I wonder if they know how much these people are hurting their victims, and how pure nasty and selfish that they really are. I have done nothing to harm anyone, and I never would, but still, little drops of poison are dripped into others ears.
It got to the point where I changed my e-mail address because I started getting nasty mails from a person who didn't like my poetry! So what...they weren't forced to read it!
I'm pleased that you have brought this subject up because it goes on far more than you would expect it to, and right now, I can do without this.
Big, big hugs!
I think every1 in life goes thru this... specially from the ones v care the most!
ReplyDeleteIt sure can get hard to get around such people. They are convincing enough to make us feel bad. Nice post. You very pretty much right on your say.
ReplyDeleteHappy Sunday!:)
People can be so mean! We just have to think about the Good ones!!
ReplyDeleteThis is so true.
ReplyDeleteAren't we as mothers, as women at a disadvantage because intrinsically our role, our softer self calls for us to be constantly on the receiving end. We have to give more and take less.
For ourselves we must learn to take the risk or forever have this hanging round our necks.
All I want is to be loved!
B M
It is often practised in a Joint-Family setup prevalent in India. The relatives always try and exploit the well to do by resorting to words that sound like endearment but reeking of greed and shameless falsehood. Excellent read madam.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I wonder if I've been one.
ReplyDeleteI don't know.
There was a long time that I felt my husband didn't love me. I don't think I ever said "If you love me, you'll do this." But I think I said something along the lines of "I feel you don't love me because you....."
That's the thing though. What if someone does (or doesn't) do something that TRULY makes the person feel they're not loved. Is it blackmail to mention it?
Great Post Ma'am !!!
ReplyDeleteI would like to exchange links with your site chaptersfrommylife.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteIs this possible?
Sometimes we do fall to blackmailing tactics from elders just because of their age and respect for them.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a perceptive, helpful post, Farida. And timely, too, because it is holiday season here, when a lot of emotional blackmail seems to rise up to steal our attention from the real meaning of our holidays.
ReplyDeleteThere's no question it's a form of emotional abuse, and the scars are unseen, but can be long-lasting.
xoxoxo
a hard fact an part of life it is Farida. I always get lost[immersed] in your posts.
ReplyDeleteim being eb for 8 years now carnt last much longer she has a terminly ill child witch beleave it or not she uses the little guy for eb gain i think this is eb at its highest level i need help
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written. I guess all of us have at one time or the other encountered at least one of these kinds. Your post gives one lots of time to think and reflect. Thanks.
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snacks no cost еach day.
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