
After giving it a lot of thought, I decided that I am not
going to put Farheena on wheelchair. The question everyone asked me was, ‘who
is going to carry her? It is OK when she is a baby, what when she grows up?’ I knew that I had no control over the future,
so I decided to do what I had to for today. I would carry her and make her walk
alternatively as long as it was possible for me. When my strength would fail, I
would decide what to do with her.
15 days after my mastectomy, I carried Farheena all the way
to BCH&RC (Bangalore Children’s Hospital and Research Center – which unfortunately
is no more) for her physiotherapy. She was not yet a year old back then, but
yet I had to stop at five places and take rest before continuing to the
hospital. I knew I needed time to do this, so I went ahead and bought a pram for her. So we
went out for walks, hospitals and shopping by tagging Farheena along with us on
her pram.
Soon I recovered from my surgery and Farheena outgrew the
pram we had bought for her. As she did not have wheel chair, she had started
walking with support by the age of 3 years. I started to carry her and make her
walk a little everywhere after that. It was quite tough, but I knew I was doing
the right thing. Someday my girl would be able to walk with a little support. The
hope and dream gave me the strength to carry my girl until she was 8 years old
or more. Not my husband, brother, father or sister could carry her even for
short distance, but I could manage her for nearly a mile.
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Though Farheena has a gait and she needs help to walk on
rough roads, she has been able to manage independently in school and home now. With
a little help she can walk nearly a 1 km now which is something no one expected from
her back then. I take great pride when she walks inside the school and climbs
stairs with her bag without asking for help from me. When we go out, Rayyan is a great help in
managing her, helping her cross roads, walk the rough footpaths and help her
climb the steps. I have slowly backed off from supporting her, because I know
someday she has to manage her life without me and I feel she is going to be all
right.
I heard lot of myths from people that I am going to end up
with hanging uterus, crippled back and many other maladies because of carrying
her as women are not supposed to carry weight. Nothing has happened so far,
other than a bit of lower back pain which could be due to my own weight gain. I
made my decision and stood by it, though at times things were so difficult that
I was on brink of giving up. I remembered the words of Walt Disney then who
said ‘The difference in winning and losing is most often… not quitting.’ Today I
feel we have won the battle…
With passing time, carrying Farheena around became effortless for me |
Hats off to both you and Farheena, Farida! And 'not quitting' is the essence of courage as well.
ReplyDeleteYou are a brave woman. Surviving all through your medical issues as well as making your daughter the way she is today is all because of your strength!
ReplyDeleteFarheena no doubt is very sensible and more mature than children of her age. Love to Farheena & Respect to you...
I am sure she will be manage her life very well.. God bless her.
Did I ever tell you what an amazing woman you are? I am so proud to be your friend.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Rachel
You are a strong woman and your life story is a huge inspiration. And I congratulate you and Farheena for winning this battle :) My best wishes to your lovely daughter.
ReplyDeleteYou are one brave lady & an inspiration for sure!!!
ReplyDeleteWow! You amaze me. You are such an inspiration. I LOVE YOU!
ReplyDeletean inspiration not just for the perseverance but also the wisdom and foresight on what is good for your girl! Hats off or bags off, lady! Bowing to the Mother in you!
ReplyDeleteyou passed on your resolution and grit to Farheena...that's why she could walk. You are an inspiration to many mothers of kids with special needs. The rest? We would not know the difference.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a wonderful, inspirational mom, Farida!! So glad you never gave up on her!!
ReplyDeleteI can't take my eyes off the last pic. You both are so gorgeous. I am glad you stuck by your decision :)
ReplyDeleteYour story is truely inspiring.. Hats off to you and your lovely daughter.. ,!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Farheena and your inspiring story Farida. It gives me courage to not quit :)
ReplyDeleteYou are an iron lady Farida. And so is your daughter. Wish you both good health for many years to come :-)
ReplyDeleteThe life you have had, the hardship you faced and the choice you made - is inspiring.
ReplyDeleteOur troubles mould us (what we become) and while they test our faith they also strengthen it somehow.
You are such a wonderful, inspirational mom. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteMam, you continue to be an inspiration :) hats ofF!!!!! ur stories and posts give me inspiration to look at life differently
ReplyDelete