I am sure that my Mom is the real winner of the Get smart contest. So many things got connected when I was thinking about her on 1st of January. In 2006, when the cheering of welcoming the New Year was dying down everywhere, we were shattered with the news of my Mom saying a final goodbye to every one.
People say it gets easier as days go by. I feel it gets tougher. In 2012, the new year day had been a bit more tough on me because of the Get Smart Contest and the Ipad2 I received on 31st of December. I couldn’t stop thinking about my Mom and how right she was.
As I mentioned in my Get Smart Contest post, I had to use different brand of washing powder after my marriage. My Mom was shocked to see me using a cheap washing powder. She went on to explain to me how my clothes would get spoiled, how surf would save my time and how easy it was to wash with surf. She was kind of brand ambassador for Rin, Pears, Pure Ghee, Oiling hair, apple, and many other such things and surf was one of them. We both held a contest to prove which was a money saver and she won. I had asked her back then, what would I do with the saved time, as I had nothing much to do anyway. She had wisely replied “May be not today, but you will have children and you may take up some activities with the free time you have on your hands. Don’t waste time because I know you have lot of potential in you and you will achieve something big someday”. I did not think much of it back then.
Days went by and as predicted by her I had two wonderful children. With my children entering my life, there was never enough of time on hand. After reaching my forties I felt I should do something, and it was then that the words of my mom came back to me. Now I see a light at the end of the tunnel, which says maybe I can do something big even now. My winning the contest for a product she insisted that I use and receiving the Ipad2 on the eve of New Year (when we lost her) tells me, she is sending a message. The message that asked me to be strong and pursue my dream, and the dream of my parents, who had faith in me. They believed I would achieve something in my life. At times I feel I am struggling to hold on under the pressure and it feels good to give way and release the pressure. This is when I need a pat on my back and I think this is my Mom patting on my back and telling me to be strong.
I may not have been the most loving kid of my mom, but she had some special trust and respect for me. My mom was a nervous person when it came to her children. She always worried they were under fed and they were not safe in the big bad world. When my brother was late by an hour or so, she would literally get sick being worried. I observed that this was missing in my case. My mom remained calm when I was late. It made me feel that she did not care for me. Why would she be worried when my brother or sister was late but not me, if she cared for me as she did for them? One day I picked up this matter with her and asked her whether she did not care for me. She was a smart woman and would have got away with a clever answer even if that was the case. I think she gave me sincere answer when she said, “I have never felt you will get in trouble. You know how to handle yourself better than anyone I have met. Even if someone gets you in trouble, I know you will get out of it easily. I trust you and know for sure you will be safe wherever you are. That is the reason why I never worry about you”. Sometime the doubt lingers whether she cleverly got out of a sticky situation by giving a smart answer. She was that way most of the time.. she did not need a contest to get smart.
It is tough to think that my Mom is a memory for me now. It is tough to think that she is not going to promote Desi Ghee and its benefits, or to think that she will scold us for not oiling our hair. Mom is precious gift God has given everyone and there is no way you will get used to the feeling of losing her. She will always be missed.
|I miss my mom.....|