Wednesday, March 13, 2013

I promote Girl Child Infanticide..Yes! You got it right!


Blog about any social cause you are passionate about, and its potential solution as a part of blogging contest organized by iDiya. I read this on Indiblogger and said it is time to write about issues regarding women, given that, being a woman blogger it is expected from me. After pondering deeply over the women’s issues I want to write about, my head is spinning now as I recall reading about the rising crime against women in India.

Child rape has been on rise, the age drastically falling down to 3 or less. Child prostitution is on rise. Abuse and rapes of women on streets, even in the metros are becoming common. Another problem that is prevailing in India is the girl child infanticide, which survey tells is common even among educated people who know and can afford the procedure. Many of the NGO’s, government of India and doctors have joined their hands together to eradicate this social evil which is a shame for civilized society. I would have happily joined the force and promoted the cause, only if I had known how is this really going to benefit the girl child.
Are we really looking from a distance where we can see the whole picture clearly?
Normally this is how it goes-
A woman is pregnant with a child, whose sex the couple and their family do not know. In normal situation, in absence of any psychological abnormality in the people, the woman would gestate for 9 months and give birth to a baby who will be lovingly accepted and loved by everyone.  In case of some severe psychological abnormality present in the people, they would decide to have a male progeny and only male progeny because of various reasons which are all baseless, which again shows the immaturity of these people.
The dumb reasons -
1)      The male child will be the heir to their family – Unfortunately the stupidity of this whole drama of waaris, or name carrier  is that the boy cannot give birth to the child which is going to continue their lineage. He will have to marry a girl who has been brought into this world by people who are smarter than his own parents.
2)      The male child will remain with the parents and take care of them- Really? Other than the legendary Shravana Kumara or some other mythological being I have read about,  I have yet to see a male child who is dedicated to taking care of the parents, in more sincere manner than a girl child would. Bite me if I am wrong. These dumb people who are thinking in terms of being taken care of by their male child are actually again dependent on the girl child whom he is going to marry. The daughter in law is often given the responsibility of taking care of them, which is if they are lucky. So often we hear news about how the son assaulted the parents who refused to give money for drinks, how they are kicked out of their homes for their properties, insulted and killed all for some trivial reasons. Give me the ratio of such crimes committed by daughters if the other digit is not zero.

3)      Girl child should be married off and given hefty dowry for doing so- Is this really important? Are women all over the world paying men hefty money to marry them, be enslaved by them and treat them like dirt? Is this not the result of those dumb people who were allowed to give birth to girl child who bring her up by stripping her off her confidence, trust, respect, love and education? Give the daughter the same love, respect, care, education and encouragement you give to your sons and no one will dare ask dowry from this empowered woman. The people who are paying dowry are falling into the pit they have dug for themselves.


4)      Some Indians believe that a father who does not have a son will go to hell called PU. Putra means one who saves the father from the hell Pu. OK, so the ticket to heaven is based on one of the copulations with wife and determination of the sex of progeny? I would think twice before coming to that conclusion.
5)      When a girl child is born we spend our lives being worried for their safety- Is this not the result of your own failure to teach the sons to respect the women? It we bring up the men teaching those values, they will not look at everything with a skirt, sari, or dress as a sex object. We teach them from birth that women are meant to serve them and that is how they have learnt to rape and treat women bad.

The government will introduce stricter laws; people will not be allowed to follow gendercides. What happens to the girls that are forced to be born to these dumb, prejudiced and cruel people who wanted to kill her before she even opened her eyes? Some may kill her after she is born in a way where they will not be held responsible. Some common practices of infanticide are strangulation, poisoning, abandonment, dumping the baby along with garbage,  drowning, live burials, starving the new born baby,  stuffing her mouth with salt, or leaving her outdoors either in cold biting nights, or in burning sun until she dies of exposure. If she somehow overcomes this hurdle and survives, she will be looked down upon as an unwanted burden, not educated, respected, nor encouraged to be empowered in the society. She grows being subordinate to her brother and father, at times being abused by them, later to be sold like some cattle to people who will marry her to their son expecting her to bear sons to continue their progeny.

Then if she bears a girl child, she will be forced to abort her baby. In case she refuses, she will be subjected to torture, humiliation and even death threats. The law and police will be again showing sympathy with her family because their minds are lying low and stinking in the gutters as they are coming from the same patriarchal society. The mother is accused for bearing girl child. The circle continues forever.
What right do we have to force these people who are not fit to be humans, leave alone parents, to have girl child? Is it right to subject the girl child to continuous humiliation and torture in name of stopping gendercide? We don’t have right to take away a life, but do we have right to subject a young baby to torture, humiliation and abuse for a life time? Only people who can care and love a daughter deserve to have her, not just every dumb and stupid person who does not know her value. I prefer encouraging those people who prefer the male child to go ahead and have them. I suggest that we stop preventing them from determining the sex of the child. It is going to create imbalance, which is already seen in states like Punjab and Haryana. One day when they cannot find the girl to marry their sons they will realize the value of the girl child. The society will learn to respect the girls and value them when they realize that those male progenies cannot carry forward their family names without a girl.

If daughters are born only in families which will love and respect them, then their future will be bright. They will be protected, educated and loved, thus giving them confidence to live their lives respectfully in the society. These people will never marry their daughters into families who demand dowry and ill treat their women. These girls, who have grown up with confidence, will look forward to having a child, not just a son, because they will know that gender does not make any difference. Along with those fetuses will die the patriarch society which uses women like doormats.
I am mother and I love my son and my daughter equally. The best compliment I give my son is “Beta you are so understanding and caring that you are like a daughter to me”. The clever young man acknowledges this compliment without questioning me because he knows the worth of being a woman in someone’s life, especially a mother’s life. 




This blog post is a part of iDiya which is ISB's National Social Venture Competition that aims to stimulate, enable and develop high-impact, self-sustaining social businesses in India, who are partnering with Indichange where bloggers are allowed to blog about any social cause they are passionate about, and its potential solution. If there are any inspiring people or organizations working towards solving it, blog about them as well.

11 comments:

  1. How Touching mam! tears rolled down when I was reading through the post. Very very well written. Completely agree with you!

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    1. I cry over the terrible suffering of girl child in our country Ramya, and this is not really a solution I found but my disgust pouring out on my blog.

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  2. Very well written and so much based on facts

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    1. The facts are much worse and shocking Farah...

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  3. These news have reach us in Norway too. It is shocking. I cant understand what make people do this.



    I have an blog award for you, I hope you will accept it.

    http://www.egedenne.com/2013/03/i-got-awards.html
    Hugs from me.
    Ege

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I will try to accept the award Ege. Work has been taking its toll and I am not much online for personal reasons nowadays. Thanks for considering me anyway.

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  4. I endorse every word you say. But sadly the outcome is not as lovely a picture. When women are less in number crimes against women will increase drastically. :(

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    1. I know Shail.. I know it is the 'frying pan to fire' situation for girl child.

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  5. Good one farida !!!
    If they can't value a girl better not give birth to her . Infact I would say if u can't value a girl better not get pregnant deliver a boy and teach him all wrong
    Anyway nice sketches !? U made them? If yes how !? Please let me know
    Thanks

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    Replies
    1. I agree. Those who try to abort girls should be prohibited from Parenting. I am glad you like the images. I made them with the help of my son who is an animator on Photoshop.

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    the interlace condo (theinterlacecondo.sg)

    ReplyDelete

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